Oceans Apart

Welcome to Sport on the Silver Screen. In this series, I will be looking back over sports movies that I have recently watched/re-watched and giving my thoughts on them. Getting into the Schmoedown and starting to follow a number of the personalities from the show has given me a much greater appreciation of movies and seen me starting to watch more.

Being a fan of both movies and sports, I have taken the chance to start highlighting the sheer volume of sports movies out there. For each movie I will be giving some details about the movie and then a quick review, including a section giving a sports fan’s perspective of the action’s realism.

Now, today I’m doing something a little different, by looking at a recently released documentary that is currently available to watch on Amazon Prime: Oceans Apart: Greed, Betrayal and Pacific Island Rugby

Directed by Callum Drummond & Axel Haudiquet

Released in 2020

Starring: Dan Leo

Synopsis: Former Samoa captain Dan Leo looks at the issues faced by Pacific Islands rugby players to see why these nations that are responsible for so many of the game’s superstars are struggling so much on the world stage.

This was a fantastic documentary and a real eye-opener. As a fan of rugby in general, I have been so disappointed to see the way that the Pacific Islands – especially Samoa and Tonga – have struggled over the last couple of decades as rugby has gone professional. So many times, I’ve been disappointed to see players from the Pacific Islands choosing to play for Tier 1 nations where they may earn just a handful of caps, rather than playing 40-odd times for the country of their birth – a notable example being Charles Piutau, who won 17 caps for New Zealand but had not played international rugby since 2015. Watching this though made me really begin to understand why the players choose to play elsewhere as there is limited financial incentive to play for the Pacific Island nations.

As the documentary explains, Dan Leo was the captain of Samoa when the team threatened to boycott a match against England at Twickenham in 2014 due to financial discrepancies within the Samoan Rugby Union, as publicly-funded money was not reaching the team. The game eventually went ahead with the promises that everything would be investigated, but nothing ever came of it bar a few headlines at the time, and Leo found himself omitted from the squad moving forwards. Leo was not the only influential Samoa player to be dropped from the national team following criticism of the union, which is headed by the Prime Minister, and the way that funds are used.

In this 1 documentary, Leo really highlights the impact of the lack of funding – showing a player who has been left to fend for himself in Romania after losing his contract due to a kidney issue while also updating us on what happened to Fijian wing Rupeni Caucaunibuca, who was one of the stars of RWC2003. As we follow his investigations, which also involve interviews with a key members of the rugby community, including James Haskell (who played in the 2014 match against Samoa), Ben Ryan (who coached Fiji to Olympic Rugby 7s Gold), outspoken Samoan centre Eliota Fuimaono-Sapolu and a number of Pacific Islanders who play in the Premiership and Pro14, the issues become clear.

As the documentary shows, many of these unions are led by people who could be considered problematic due to their role in the nation’s government, but as the documentary shows, the issues go beyond the national unions and to the way that the nations are treated by World Rugby, who clearly favour the “Tier 1” nations, with Brett Gosper (who was at the time CEO of World Rugby, but will now be stepping down to take up a role within the NFL in the New Year) coming across very poorly in an interview.

I won’t say any more about this, except that this should be a must-watch for all rugby fans, and that hopefully this will lead to pushes for change that will give more support to nations outside of Tier 1.

What did you think of the documentary? Let me know in the comments. Until next time!

Who is behind the Schmoeminati?

If we only learned one thing during Schmoedown Spectacular V, it was this: the Schmoeminati are real. For months we watched Andrew Ghai’s descent into madness as he tried to warn us and prove their existence, and it proved costly for him, as he was kidnapped by unknown assailants led by a masked figure.

But now we know that the Schmoeminati are real, the questions turn to their identity and their motives. Ghai had the information but that’s lost to us now. The only thing we know is that Chairman Kristian Harloff – shadowy leader of the last coup – is not involved but that means that the rest of the league are still potential suspects.

Let me know who you think is behind the Schmoeminati, but my chief suspects are below:

Suspect #1: Brad Gilmore

The BOAT is an up-and-coming talent in the Schmoedown crew. As host of the Schmoedown Rundown and now also Coming Up Next, he has years of experience as a pundit and has also filled in occasionally in post-match interviews and on the desk, and Kristian Harloff has even mentioned the prospect of him being the heir to Harloff’s place on the deskin the long-term.

But does the BOAT want to wait for nature to take its course, or is he taking a leaf out of Harloff’s books and using subterfuge to take control of the league by steadily infiltrating the league and then brainwashing one of the league’s biggest faces? Speculation? Yes, but go back to the Rundown episode immediately following Spectacular (and Andrew Ghai’s capture – and a certain BOAT is mysteriously missing…

Suspect #2: Grace Hancock

I mentioned in my 5 takeaways from Spectacular to watch out for Grace’s revenge following Kate Mulligan’s decision to fire her, and with her being on bad terms with so many of the other managers (not to mention Chairman Kristian Harloff, who is scared of her), she may have decided that the Schmoeminati is the best way to entrench herself in the league so they can’t get rid of her.

You could argue that the Schmoeminati started before Grace was fired, but I have 2 words for you: CONTINGENCY PLAN. This isn’t the first time Grace has been dropped from a team and with the lack of success in the latter half of the season for The Den, she may have sensed that her role as an advisor was anything but a position of power, and made plans to cement herself in the league.

Let’s not forget that she took advantage of Dagnino locking Emma Fyffe in a closet in order to become the post-match interviewer for the inaugural Collision – never rule the Lioness out when it comes to something despicable.

Suspect #3: Mark Ellis

“Surely not Baby Carrots!” I hear you all cry out, but how better to avoid suspicion than to be one of the most jovial people in the league? Mark Ellis was one of the founders of the Schmoedown, and yet it is Kristian Harloff who gets the majority of the credit and gets to rule the league, while everybody’s favourite dog stepfather is left to give the rulings of all the challenges and bear the brunt of the competitors and managers who are unhappy with the decision.

It’s just a matter of time before someone would snap under that pressure and maybe that is what Ellis has done here, putting into action a plan that will see him oust his former teammate at the top of the league. Rumours that the Schmoeminati have taken control of all the Coors Light on the Wes Coast are still under investigation.

Suspect #4: Frank Janisch

First off, just look at the picture above. This guy is worshipping Kylo Ren so can’t be trusted! Let’s not forget that we never heard of the Schmoeminati until after Frankie Numbaz made the move from Chicago to the West Coast. As a longtime host of the Schmoedown Rundown, he has always had access to people and information behind the scenes in the league, but in recent months has seen his Rundown co-host Brad Gilmore getting a second show while he is even facing pressure in the stats department these days.

With his role as the stats guy onscreen now under threat, has West Coast Frank started making moves to grab more power within the Schmoedown and secure his name of “The Truth” once and for all…?

Suspect #5: ZaFlertinflouse

“The Trending Nightmare” is a mystery wrapped in an enigma and shrouded in conspiracy theories, the most recent of which is that he is behind the Schmoeminati. Did the mask worn by Andrew Ghai’s abductor look familiar? That’s because it has a blink and you’ll miss it appearance in the video for his hit single “Und Und Und”, worn by none other than the Flouse!

The current belief is that the Flouse is looking to take over the league to force the Schmoedown Pros to sing in the chorus for his upcoming album “Spin from the Peg”. Rumours that the planned first release “Sexy Buzzer” will be a duet with Brendan Meyer have been quashed.

Suspect #6: Sabrina Ramirez & Brandon Hanna

We’ve focused on individual suspects for now, but who says that an organisation like the Schmoeminati can only have 1 person at the head. Sabrina Ramirez warned us before Spectacular that she and Brandon Hanna were about to become the league’s new power couple, which is hard to believe when you look and Hanna’s soul-destroying, never-ending promos.

But what if those promos were to lull us into a false sense of security while the Schmoeminati quietly came in and grabbed hold of the league under the overall running of Ramirez, who had a quiet season after being picked up on the Free Agency deadline day with only 1 chance to compete. Ramirez is someone to watch out for in this league, and Hanna could be the perfect underrated sidekick/henchman.

Suspect #7: John Rocha & Finstock

As the resident mask-wearers in the league, of course Rocha and Finstock have to be suspects! It’s been a bad season for both Rocha and Finstock, with a Faction Championship that should have been theirs for the taking ending up falling away from them midway through the season. And yet despite this, the pair joined up to throw the GOAT Dan Murrell out of the faction at the end of the season – a move that boggles the mind!

Why else would they do this if they didn’t have some nefarious plan to take over the league, and with Dagnino’s mysterious contacts, it’s easy to see the Schmoeminati forming. Rumours that the Reel Rejects’ multi-mask entry against Cuckoo’s Mess was a rite of passage to join the Schmoeminati are being investigated.

Suspect #8: Jessica Sterger & PLD

And so we reach the final suspects, with the most interesting motives. PLD is the third leg of Action Industries and has never fully got over the break-up of Team Action, while Jessica Sterger (Jenn’s Action-loving identical twin) has been mooted as the perfect manager for and Action reunion.

There’s just been one problem: both Ben Bateman and Andrew Ghai had moved on from Action and become more respectful of the game and their opponents, with Ghai even going so far as to change the name “Dastardly” to “Debonair”. Well Bateman’s struggles this season seem to have pushed him back towards his old self, but it looks like the arrival of the Schmoeminati has been focused on pushing Ghai beyond what he could take and forcing him to snap back to his dastardly self. There is a legitimate chance that the 2021 Draft will see Team Action reunited, and with both the Action Army and Schmoeminati behind them, all hell could be set to break loose…

5 Takeaways from Schmoedown Spectacular V

Merry Christmas you filthy animals! This has been an interesting year to say the least with the COVID-19 pandemic changing everybody’s life to some degree. But through it all, one constant remained: the Movie Trivia Schmoedown. Season 7 was titled “The New Era” and that proved the case even more than we expected, as it adapted to the changing environment by moving to an online format to ensure that we continued to get or weekly entertainment and another fantastic season ended in truly spectacular showpiece event to end the year – the 5ᵗʰ annual Schmoedown Spectacular.

Schmoedown Spectacular V was available to watch live and on demand in the aftermath for those able to purchase it, but for those who are waiting for it to drop on YouTube for free, only 1 match has aired at time of writing. This article will be looking back at the whole event, so be warned there will be spoilers galore beyond this point!

Spectacular V ended up being a 9 hour epic, with betrayals, mystery and 6 fantastic matches:

Alex Damon TKO’d Andres Cabrera 32-24 to retain the Star Wars Title

Britney Young defeated Chris Jericho 16-15

The Odd Couple defeated Shazam! 41-40 to claim the Teams Title

Chandru Dhandapani defeated Chance Ellison to retain the Innergeekdom Title

Kevin Smith TKO’d ZaFlertinflouse 18-9

Adam Collins defeated Dan Murrell in Sudden Death 39-38 to claim the Singles Title

KOrruption win the Faction Title

Rushmore secured

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The make-up of the Schmoedown Mt Rushmore is a constant debate, with so many players in the conversation and Dan Murrell probably one of the only players who would make it onto everybody’s list. I would argue that Jeff Sneider should have also secured his place following this season.

“The Insneider” has become the first Schmoedown Pro to win 10 matches with one team and the Teams Title 3 times – 1 time with The Patriots, twice with The Odd Couple – and while he has had his ups and downs in Singles, he has still accrued a 13-8 record that includes a Championship Match and 2 other #1 Contender Matches.

Having debuted in Season 3, he is one of the longest-tenured Schmoedown Pros and has not taken a break from competing since he entered the league, while always putting on a show in his own unique way. Does he court controversy? Yes, but the league would be much more boring without him, and for his longevity, expertise in the Teams Division and his entertainment value, he has earned his spot on Mt Rushmore.

Stock crash

When season 7 started, it looked like the Finstock Exchange would run away with the Faction Title. Having been manager for the Horsemen in Season 6, with Ben Bateman and the Founding Fathers ending the season as champions – and Who’s The Boss being among the top 5 teams, making them a protected team – Dagnino was able to draft 4 legit superstars of the league with his first 4 picks, while picking up the relatively unknown rookie the Barbarian in the 6ᵗʰ round. However, things didn’t go to plan and the season ended with the Exchange dropping to 4ᵗʰ, behind Roxy Striar’s Roxstars at Spectacular.

It’s going to be all change for them next year too, if the way the season ended is anything to go by. Ben Bateman made clear after his 2ⁿᵈ loss to Dan Murrell that he was done with Finstock’s mismanagement, and the 2-time Manager of the Year then made the critical error of backing John Rocha as he split from Dan Murrell, leaving the GOAT as a Free Agent. So that’s 2 of the big 4 who are gone for good. But the Barbarian has also seemed a little put out at the way 2 greats of the game have been treated and I wouldn’t be shocked to see him turn his back on the faction to partner with either Bateman or Murrell and create a new superteam. Meanwhile Free Agent pick-up Sabrina Ramirez was given little chance to show her quality and if her statement at the beginning of the event is anything to go by, she’s another who will be looking to ply her trade elsewhere in Season 8.

And then we come to Andrew Dimalanta. The Star Wars specialist finally got his first wins in the division under Tom Dagnino and with a guaranteed title shot, you’d think that Bobby Gucci would want to retain his services going into 2021. However, as John Rocha went on a spree of blaming everyone (except himself and Dagnino) for the faction’s failings, even Dimalanta came under fire for his loss to Ace Cabrera. Will Dimalanta stay loyal to a manager that helped him get his first win, or will the shots from the new face of the faction make him look elsewhere for a more supportive faction?

Keep an eye out for my predictions on who each manager signs during Free Agency over the next week.

The Schmoeminati are real!

How can we forget the moment on Schmoedown Backstage when Andrew Ghai turned up to discuss his upcoming match with Mike Kalinowski, but instead spent his time telling us that there was a Schmoeminati controlling the league behind the scenes.

We all thought he was crazy as we watched his descent into madness through the second half of the season and promised to prove to us at Spectacular that the Schmoeminati exists. Well he did that, but not in the way he had planned, as we watched him get kidnapped by a group being led by this masked figure.

And so we are left with plenty of questions. First of all, is Andrew Ghai OK? If you watched the next couple of shows on the Action Industries channel, then he was unexpectedly absent, with an odd new answer phone message and text responses to “keep smiling :)” Next up, who is the Schmoeminati and what do they want? Ghai made it clear that Kristian Harloff is not involved, but with so many people involved in the League as a competitor/manager/announcer/pundit/crew member, that doesn’t really narrow things down too much.

Keep an eye out over the coming weeks for my thoughts on the likely culprits.

Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned

It’s not just the Finstock Exchange that will likely look very different in 2021, as Kate Mulligan followed up ZaFlertinflouse’s loss to Kevin Smith by firing adviser Grace Hancock.

Will this be the end of Grace? I think it would be foolish to rule “the Lioness” out, but she’s running out of allies in the league. She abandoned the Lion’s Den so won’t be welcome in the Finstock Exchange, was fired by KOrruption to make room for Shannon and has now been fired by the Den. Meanwhile Kaiser an Roxy have both found themselves at odds with her. But with so many feuds, don’t be shocked to see her back at some point – maybe not this year – as a manager for a new faction hell-bent on causing trouble.

Increasing value

It’s hard to imagine that many Star Wars specialists will be picked up in Free Agency due to the limited number of matches they will play in a season, so much so that they may not even be a priority in the opening rounds of the draft as managers look to ensure they have strength in Singles and Innergeekdom with at least 1 top quality team. However, a couple of competitors likely saw a rise in their stock at Spectacular.

Andrew Dimalanta was already promised a title shot against Alex Damon, but Commissioner Clarke Wolfe also announced during Spectacular that Mollie Damon and Laura Kelly will face off in a #1 Contenders Match, with the winner either facing the winner of Damon v Dimalanta or joining them in a Triple Threat (at Alex Damon’s discretion). There are very few competitors with guaranteed matches in 2021 at this point, so to be able to pick up a Star Wars competitor with a guaranteed match very early in the season is a chance for some early points, and Kelly/Damon may even look more attractive options than Dimalanta due to the potential of 2 matches early in the season, while I also feel that both are capable of Dimalanta, who got a number of favourable calls during his tournament run.

Similarly, another competitor who may see a rise in their stock is Mara Knopic. The former Innergeekdom Champion may not have played in years, so there may be some questions about her ability to compete at the top straight away, however a guaranteed title shot early in the season will probably see her rise above many of the other IG specialists as there is the chance of an early victory to win the title, and even if she loses then it will not be too long until she is able to make another run for the title.

For more thoughts on Free Agency and the Draft, keep an eye on this site, as I will be posting my Free Agency predictions over the coming weeks, and I’m planning to put together my draft predictions once Free Agency has completed.

Credit for the header image goes to Alex from the Let’s Get Ready Network – check them out on Twitter @0M3GAxVID30

Autumn Nations Cup 2020: Team of the Tournament

We are now 1 week removed from the end of the inaugural Autumn Nations Cup, and so the only thing left to do is pick my Team of the Tournament. This year’s competition was far from perfect, with COVID-19 causing all of Fiji’s pool games to be cancelled, very little prep time for the Georgians and a player usage agreement with the Top 14 leaving the French only able to use each player a couple of times – leading to them playing their final with an inexperienced squad of fringe players.

Of course, this did not help for picking a team of the tournament as some players only featured in 1 match, whereas others got the full 4 matches, and I have generally chosen to give more credit for consistency than a great one-off performance.

As always, I’d love to hear who you would pick, but without further ado, my Team of the 2020 Tri Nations is:

1) Danilo Fischetti: It’s so great seeing an Italian prop putting in great performances again! The Zebre prop has secured the number 1 jersey for the Azzurri over the last year with a number of powerful performances. Fischetti throws his weight about in defence but also has the control of his body to stay on his feet and lock in over the ball to win a number of turnovers.

2) Jamie George: The England pack is an absolute beast, and Jamie George is certainly a grateful beneficiary of that, being able to hang on at the back of the maul to drop over the line for simple tries. However, he plays a key role in setting this up with his reliability at the set piece, while he is also a solid defender who is also comfortable with the ball in hand.

3) Kyle Sinckler: Sticking with the England pack and Kyle Sinckler gets the nod here as part of a front row that demolished all that challenged it. The Bristol tighthead has always had the talent but has matured and cut out the stupid penalties, to make himself a real force in the game.

4) Maro Itoje: I’m not the biggest fan of the England lock as he gives away some truly brainless penalties an should be penalised much more often, but even I can recognise that he is a phenomenal player and when he gets it right, he gets it very right, with a number of turnovers and constant hassling at the opposition lineout.

5) James Ryan: I certainly found it hard to pick a second player here, but instead settled on James Ryan. Similar to Itoje, I am not as high on him as the rest of the world seems to be, and the issues with the Irish lineout certainly don’t help, but he has an engine on him and will continually put in the hard carries and tackles.

6) Jamie Ritchie: The Scottish flanker is a constant nuisance, there is no finer praise I can give. Dangerous at the breakdown and a threat with ball in hand when there is space in front of him, you can always rely on him to put in consistent performances.

7) Justin Tipuric: The Welshman was one of the few positives for Wayne Pivac’s men and like Ritchie, you always know that you’re going to get a 110% performance from him. We always know that he is dangerous around the breakdown, but this tournament also gave us a timely reminder of just how dangerous he is carrying in space.

8) Caelan Doris: I really enjoy watching the Leinster back row play, as he provides such a reliable carrying option for Andy Farrell, able to make the hard yards in tight, but also able to open up his stride in wider areas to make the big metres. He’s the kind of player who will take Ireland to the next level.

9) Antoine Dupont: Dupont is without a doubt one of the best scrum halves in the world and an absolute joy to watch. He may have had limited minutes in the tournament, but does so much with his time on the pitch that he still set himself above everyone else, helped in part with a number of teams lacking consistency at the position during their matches.

10) Matthieu Jalibert: Jalibert looks to be locked in as the back-up to Romain Ntamack for now and certainly needs to get more experience at international level, but looked very promising during this tournament. He continued the running of the French attack in Ntamack’s absence an was reliable off the tee, being a key part of France’s run to the final, where his injury proved costly.

11) Duhan van der Merwe: Scotland’s new 6′ 4″ wing gives an extra dimension to their attack. Allowed the freedom to come looking for the ball, van der Merwe gives a physical option in the back line, while still having the pace to take advantage of any clean air, and the brain to create great attacking opportunities with snipes around the breakdown or clever running lines.

12) Merab Sharikadze: Many may be surprised to see a Georgian make the list, but the Lelos’ captain led by example throughout the tournament and constantly provided a staunch defensive barrier to hassle opponents.

13) Chris Farrell: The Munster centre took his chances to play with aplomb, providing a solid defence while being arguably one of their better players in attack, though his chances were much more limited with Ireland’s territory-focused gameplan when Ross Byrne was at 10.

14) Hugo Keenan: The new man on the scene for Ireland has surely secured his place in the Irish back 3. Comfortable under the high ball and with good footwork, Keenan provides reliability at the highest level while also bringing a genuine attacking threat.

15) Brice Dulin: Arguably one of the biggest beneficiaries from the match limit agreement between the Top 14 and the French national team, Dulin was given the chance to show his quality against Italy and England. His silky footwork made him dangerous in space and his high bomb added another weapon to the French arsenal.

Rugby Championship 2020: Team of the Tournament

With the Rugby Championship over for another year, there is only 1 thing left to do: pick my Team of the Tournament. This year’s competition was a little different, with World Champions South Africa sitting out as they looked to get back on track following the COVID-19 pandemic, leaving us with a Tri Nations featuring just New Zealand, Australia and Argentina, while the entire tournament was played in Australia to make COVID precautions easier to deal with.

New Zealand may have won the tournament, but they will not look back on this year fondly as they struggled for any consistency under Ian Foster and lost in consecutive matches to Argentina and Australia. The Wallabies and Pumas meanwhile played out 2 draws that left them unable to claim the top spot, though they should be proud of their accomplishments given the inexperience of the Australia team and the lack of post-COVID rugby for the Pumas.

As always, I’d love to hear who you would pick, but without further ado, my Team of the 2020 Tri Nations is:

1) Nahuel Tetaz Chaparro: The loosehead position was one of the harder ones to pick due to the variation in the starting players. However for me, Tetaz Chaparro’s absence was keenly felt when he wasn’t on the pitch as the scrums went from a weapon to a liability.

2) Julián Montoya: A number of hookers showed moments of real quality, but Montoya got the nod here. A long-term understudy at international level for Agustín Creevy, Montoya has bags of experience at the international level despite just a handful of Test starts, and proved his quality as a key piece of Argentina’s robust defensive efforts.

3) Taniela Tupou: The “Tongan Thor” may not have had things all his own way in the tournament, splitting time with Allan Ala’alatoa during the tournament, but when he was on the pitch, he added physicality and bite to Australia’s attack and defence, while also gaining an advantage over his opponents in the scrum.

4) Guido Petti: The Argentine lock sat out the last match as part of the fallout from the re-emergence of some controversial tweets, but ahead of that he was a key part of Argentina’s set piece, giving reliability on their own lineout throw while frequently stealing or hassling opposition ball.

5) Matt Philip: The Rebels lock may only have a handful of caps to his name, but he looks like he has been playing Test rugby for years – there can be no higher compliment than that. Philip looked controlled the lineout and also carried well to add more power to the Wallabies pack.

6) Pablo Matera: The Argentina captain led from the front and led by example. A key physical part of the Pumas defence with organised tackles and opportunistic turnovers. Meanwhile on attack, he carried hard and almost won Argentina their first Test against the Wallabies with a cultured kick forwards at the death that should have been finished by Santiago Cordero. I would call the Argentinian one of the best – but also most underrated – opensides in world rugby.

7) Sam Cane: Marcos Kremer was another key part of the Pumas’ defensive effort, while Michael Hooper added experience to a young back row. However I instead went for Sam Cane. He’s not the flashiest of players by any means, but is such a threat at the breakdown and always seems to be in the right place to make a key turnover, while also putting his body on the line for the win.

8) Rodrigo Bruni: Harry Wilson looked good and will get better as he gains experience at this level, but I went for Rodrigo Bruni this time around. He may not have played as much as his fellow number 8s, but when he was on the pitch he just added to the formidable Pumas defence. Argentina never looked stronger than when they had their first choice back row on the pitch.

9) Nic White: I may not be the biggest fan of White, but with such an inexperienced team around him and limitations at fly half, White did a key job of bringing experience and control to the game. I’m hoping hat Tate McDermott will be given more frequent game time moving forwards, as his youth and attacking ability would create a strong counterpoint to White’s control and kicking game.

10) Nicolás Sánchez: It had looked like Sánchez may be past his prime, but he was back with a bang in this tournament. While his attacking opportunities may have been a little limited, his control of the game was highlighted whenever he came off the pitch, while his kicking off the tee allowed the Pumas to keep the scoreboard ticking over despite a largely defensive performance.

11) Marika Koroibete: The Rebels winger just beats out Caleb Clarke as I feel he was a little more consistent. Koroibete’s attacking talents are clear for all to see, but something that often gets forgotten is his workrate both on and off the ball and his accomplished defence, which often comes to the fore at key moments.

12) Hunter Paisami: Matt To’omua’s injury could have been costly, but Hunter Paisami did a fantastic job of replacing him. He was more commonly seen at 13 for the Reds during Super Rugby AU, but looked more reliable at 12, where the defensive job allowed him to focus on using his physicality, while he also provided a great carrying option in attack.

13) Matías Orlando: The new signing for the Newcastle Falcons gets the nod here as much for his consistency at the position while Australia and New Zealand chopped and changed. That consistency at the 13 position is a key factor in Argentina’s success as he helped to keep the defence organised and stop teams breaking wider out fromthe breakdown.

14) Bautista Delguy: He may only be 23 years old, but it feels like Delguy has been around for years. Unfortunately he wasn’t at his best in the World Cup as he was just returning from injury, but he showed us all what we were missing in this tournament. While being solid in defence, he was a bright spark with ball in hand, proving very difficult to bring down.

15) Santiago Carreras: He may have had a torrid time when moved to fly half, but Carreras looked so solid at 15. He’s known for his attacking quality, but was reliable in the more defensive performances from the Pumas and used his big boot to good effect. At just 22, he is anther player to keep your eye on over the coming years.

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Prepare for Something… SPECTACULAR

It’s safe to say that the COVID-19 pandemic stopped the Movie Trivia Schmoedown from going as expected this year, but everyone involved has done a wonderful job of transitioning to a digital format and giving us an fantastic and utterly unpredictable season. And the ultimate reward of that is that we still get the 5ᵗʰ annual Schmoedown Spectacular!

Schmoedown’s very own Wrestlemania, Spectacular V is this Saturday and will see some of the biggest names in the league compete over 6 matches – including 4 Championship Matches – and at the end of the event, we will know the winner of the first ever Faction Championship. But who will be facing off in this mammoth event, and who will win? I’ve not had a great year with my predictions, but let’s see if I can redeem myself on big stage.

Star Wars Championship: Alex Damon v Andres Cabrera

Will “The Demon” have finally met his match? The man who makes his living explaining Star Wars has looked unbeatable but hasn’t competed in the Star Wars Division since beating Laura Kelly at Spectacular IV. Meanwhile, Ace has ran the gauntlet this year, going on a Cinderella run that saw him go from the Play In Match all the way to winning the tournament, with wins over Josh Quevedo, Ken Napzok, Laura Kelly and Andrew Dimalanta.

Alex has previously mentioned that he didn’t know some of the answers Ace was pulling in the tournament as the questions went deeper than ever, and I think that had this match come hot on the heels of that tournament, we would have a new champion. However, it has been months since then, so you can guarantee that Alex will have dived deeper than ever before, while the momentum that Ace had will have been nullified. I can still see this one going the distance, but I have Alex defending his title.

Chris Jericho v Britney Young

One of the GOATs of pro-wrestling, Jericho’s arrival in the league as a Free Agent pick-up for the Roxstars was a high point of the season and his match against Kevin Smith was an absolute treat! Meanwhile, Britney Young of GLOW fame made her name in the Schmoedown as part of the GLOW celebrity match, putting in an impressive performance and enjoying the game so much, she accepted a place on the active roster this season, being picked up by The Dungeon.

Neither of these competitors have much in the way of game tape, but both have shown themselves to have a decent knowledge base. However, there is a hint that Britney’s knowledge may be slightly broader, whereas Jericho’s more focused. If Jericho can hit a favoured category in Round 2, then I think he can ace it, but I think that Britney will have the breadth of knowledge to take a narrow win. One thing I do feel confident in though is that we will get some killer promos.

Teams Championship: Shazam! v Odd Couple

The Teams Championship has bounced around a little this season, with KOrruption taking the belts from the Founding Fathers only to lose them to Shazam! just 2 months later! Meanwhile, former champions the Odd Couple have recovered from their early season loss against Who’s The Boss to run through the recent Teams Tournament, and have arguably looked better than when they won the title.

Sneider has been on something of a revenge tour of late, beating Paul Oyama in both Teams and Singles to avenge his Season 6 Championship loss, while also avenging his loss to Adam Collins in the final of this season’s Singles Tournament by defeating Deception in the Teams Tournament. Could this revenge tour continue against the team who defeated them in the quarterfinals of the 2019 Ultimate Schmoedown? We have 4 superstars on display so I expect this to go to the wire, but I think that the online format’s speed round benefits William Bibbiani more than the buzzer round, so I have Shazam! defending their title.

Innergeekdom Championship: Chandru Dhandapani v Chance Ellison

Who’d have thought that fans would be cheering for “The Cobra”? Such is the mood against Chandru Dhandapani, who had the gall to talk smack about Rachel Cushing. Dhandapani’s route to the title saw him defeat Brandon Hanna to set up a #1 Contender Match against Mike Kalinowski. However, Kalinowski put his faction before his personal glories and turned down the match in order to compete in the Innergeekdom Tournament – a move which looks to have helped KOrruption secure the Faction Championship, as both Kalinowski and his Padawan Chance each ran through their side of the tournament bracket to reach the final, where Chance came away with the win. Meanwhile Chandru’s match against Kevin Smets certainly didn’t go as expected as the champion struggled to get in the zone playing online and lost the title to Chandru.

This is an interesting one, as Chance has the experience of close Championship matches and has been a regular in he online format this season, but as a triple-threat competitor he won’t have been able to focus on IG subjects in the same depth as Chandru, an IG specialist. While my heart has Chance following in the footsteps of KO, I have to go with my head, which has Chandru becoming the first Schmoedown Pro to defend the Innergeekdom Title since Jason Inman defeated Mark Donica.

Kevin Smith v Brett Sheridan

One of the big announcements from the Free Agency deadline, Kevin Smith proved that he was more than “Good Enough” as he took down Chris Jericho in his Schmoedown debut. Meanwhile Brett Sheridan shocked the world (and arguably even himself) as he defeated Bonnie Somerville at the start of the season.

Now no offence to Brett, but I can’t imagine him pulling out the victory over Kevin Smith, though I can see it going to the final round. Instead, the questions to ask about this match are:

What will Kevin Smith do if he spins Kevin Smith on the wheel?
Will the big stage of Spectacular V see the grand return of ZaFlertinFlouse?
Will Inappropriate Elmo or Jon Voight from Anaconda make an appearance in an attempt to put Kevin Smith off?

Singles Championship: Dan Murrell v Adam Collins

While you would never rule out Dan Murrell being in the main event of Spectacular, who would have guessed that his opponent would be Adam Collins, a man who went undrafted and was picked up on the final day of Free Agency. That acquisition arguably won Shannon Barney the Factions Championship, as “The Coyote” went all the way from Play In Match to the Ultimate Schmoedown winner.

Murrell has held on to the belt the hard way after winning it back from Ben Bateman in Atlanta, going into the final round 6 down to “The Boss” in their rematch, while beating Ethan Erwin in Sudden Death, so it’s hard to imagine him struggling for a 4ᵗʰ consecutive Championship Match. Collins however has looked so solid in Singles, but did begin to show some cracks before losing with Deception, and now needs to show that he can recover quickly to take on the GOAT. I see Murrell leading by a point or 2 into the final round, and holding the lead to secure victory.

How do you see these matches playing out? Regardless, I’m certain that this event will be – as its name suggests – spectacular!

Autumn Nations Cup 2020: England v France

With Saturday having seen 3ʳᵈ-8ᵗʰ decided, Sunday saw England hosting France at Twickenham to decide the overall winner of the 2020 Autumn Nations Cup. A player usage agreement with the Top 14 meant that France were using fringe players against what Eddie Jones would probably consider close to his ideal XV, and it was the home team who opened the scoring in front of 2000 fans with a penalty from Owen Farrell. Les Bleus weren’t just there to make up the numbers, though, and when Matthieu Jalibert broke through the England defence on the edge of their 22, he quickly spread it wide to put Brice Dulin over for the opening try, which Jalibert converted. Elliot Daly and Jalibert traded penalties, but England were gifted an opportunity at the end of the half as Dulin failed to recognise that he had been passed the ball by a player outside his 22, kicking the ball out on the full to give England a lineout deep in the French 22. England went through 12 phases camped on the French line – during which George Ford butchered an overlap to go for the line himself – before Ellis Genge knocked on as he tried to fight his was across from a pick-and-go. The French won the free kick at the resulting scrum and were able to put the ball into touch to end the half with a 6-13 lead.

The second half stared as the first ended, with Anthony Watson knocking on Owen Farrell’s cross kick in the air, but Farrell soon kicked a penalty to narrow the gap, before missing a couple of kicks in a row. Jalibert left the pitch early with an injury and was replaced by fellow youngster Louis Carbonel, and though he struggled to get the offence running as well with Jonathan Danty also off, his kicking from the tee was on point as he kicked to penalties to one more from Farrell to give Les Bleus a 7-point lead with just minutes left. It looked like the French would hold out for the unlikeliest of victories, but referee Andrew Brace and TMO Ben Whitehouse both failed to spot 2 clear knock-ons from the English in their last gasp attack, before Brace awarded England a penalty. George Ford kicked to the corner and the England pack managed to drive the ball infield for Luke Cowan-Dickie to go over with the clock in the red, Farrell kicking the conversion in the clutch to leave the scores level at 19-19 at full time.

And so the game entered sudden death extra time, and for a moment it looked as if it would be over almost immediately as England were awarded a penalty, but Owen Farrell’s kick hit the right post and flew across the face of the posts without going between them. France worked their way downfield but were unable to set up the drop goal, ending the first period still at 19-19. England started getting the decisions in the second period, though, which allowed them to control the territory. France were clearly tiring quicker and when Alivereti Raka was isolated following a clever kick to the corner, England were awarded another penalty and Farrell bisected the posts to complete the most undeserving of victories and be crowned the first ever Autumn Nations Cup Champions.

Kick to nowhere

You know what you’re getting with England these days: a solid defence, and the ball being kicked within a couple of phases of winning possession. And yet despite having a back line full of talented kickers of the ball – Ben Youngs, Owen Farrell, George Ford, Henry Slade and Elliot Daly – the kicking game was an absolute shambles in this game.

In Anthony Watson and Jonny May, England have 2 premier talents, with the pace and aerial ability to cause problems for their opponents, and yet they were barely given a chance to compete, while Brice Dulin and Matthieu Jalibert had a relatively easy job of dealing with most of their kicks.

George Ford is supposedly one of the premier attacking 10s in World Rugby – as the commentary repeatedly told us – and yet he did nothing of note in attack other than butcher a try just before half time, while his kicking was aimless, other than one quality kick to the corner to set up the game-tying try. Meanwhile, reliable kicker Owen Farrell may as well have flipped a coin before each kick to decide if it was going ever or not – he never seemed to get fully comfortable on the day, which almost proved costly.

If England are going to rely on defence and the kicking game rather than trying to play rugby, they need to be perfect in everything they do. This is a game that they should have lost, and they need to seriously improve if they want to even stand a chance against the French in the Six Nations.

La fiabilité

For so long, the cliché has been that you never know which French team will turn up from week to week. Well that can be well and truly forgotten right now. Under Fabien Galthié, the French team has been largely consistent in its selection – though don’t be surprised to see a few fringe players fighting for a spot after the last couple of performances – but the consistency has gone even beyond that.

With Shaun Edwards coaching the defence, the French have become so solid and reliable, while their discipline is also far better than it was beforehand. And even this week, with the fringe players on the pitch who have likely had less time in camp, that defensive solidity was clear to all to see.

And yet unlike some teams with strong defences, they also have the attacking skills to match it. Yes, they were a little lacking towards the end of the game, but Louis Carbonel will only improve as he gets more experience both for Toulon and France, and will also benefit from playing with a settled team that has more chemistry.

From the early stages of the 2020 Six Nations, I felt confident that France would be my favourites to win the 2023 Rugby World Cup. The more I see of them, the more confident I feel of that prediction.

Autumn Nations Cup 2020: Wales v Italy

Saturday’s 3ʳᵈ and final Autumn Nations Cup game came took us to Parc y Scarlets, where Wales hosted Italy in the fight for 5ᵗʰ place. Wayne Pivac had selected a team with a blend of youth and experience, and they got off to the better start as Taulupe Faletau put Justin Tipuric through a gap and the flanker fed Kieran Hardy to go over for his first Test try, which Callum Sheedy converted. 10 minutes later and another Welsh player was celebrating their first Test try, as Wales went through the phases and Sam Parry eventually pushed over from close range, Sheedy converting again. Italy finally started to get some possession in the Welsh half and Paolo Garbisi opened their account with a penalty. Just a few minutes later, Italy had a lineout on the Welsh 22, and when the maul came infield, Carlo Canna played a grubber in behind the defensive line and his centre partner Marco Zanon collected the ball to cross for his first Test try, which Garbisi duly converted. The Welsh were shook and on a warning for repeat infringements, which proved costly just before the end of the half, as a break from a ruck released Stephen Varney and the Gloucester halfback took the ball all the way to the Welsh 22. Josh Adams finally brought him down, but did not support his weight as he tried to force the turnover and found himself being sent to the sin bin, while Garbisi kicked the penalty to cut Wales’ lead to 14-13 at the break.

Despite the numerical disadvantage, it was Wales who had the better start to the second half, with Sheedy kicking a penalty to extend the lead, but Italy made use of the width of the pitch and the extra man to release Johan Meyer down the right wing, and the flanker sent Ioan Lloyd flying as crashed over for the go-ahead score. As the hour mark approached, Wales began to bring on the replacements, and they saw a marked improvement in the team’s performance. having been put through a gap by Taulupe Faletau in the first half, Justin Tipuric repaid the favour, and the number 8 released Gareth Davies, who outpaced the Italian defence to go over for the try, converted by Sheedy. The game was still in the balance, but Italy played too much in the midfield and were turned over with very few players left to defend out wide, which Wales took advantage of to get up to the Italian try line, before George North picked from the back of the ruck to go the final metres to score, Sheedy converting again. The result had already been decided but there was still time for Wales to add 1 more try, as Callum Sheedy’s delayed pass put the ball behind Federico Mori to Faletau, who put Tipuric over for the final try, which Sheedy converted for a final score of 38-18.

Breaking down

Wales have seriously been missing the breakdown talents of Josh Navidi, and it became apparent in this game. The team gave away a whopping 8 penalties in the first half for offences at the breakdown, with a couple of penalties coming on their own ball but most coming as they tried to win turnovers that weren’t on, either not releasing the tackled player, not coming through the gate or going off their feet. A few penalties is understandable, but the volume they were giving them away was embarrassing!

With all these penalties, it was a simple matter for Italy to claw themselves back into the match from 14-0 down. And much of this came from Wales’ inability to control the contact area. They will face much sterner tests than the Azzurri, and for this reason they need to be smarter at the breakdown. Josh Navidi’s return will be a massive help, as he is such a physical player and a great operator at the breakdown, but they cannot rely on him and a number of the other players in the squad, especially players in the pack, need to step up and do more if this team wants to improve anytime soon.

Defensive unity

Wales had clearly done their homework on the Italy defence as they found a weakness and ruthlessly exploited it. The Italians have added some real physicality to their defence, but too often they were not defending as a unit, but instead looking for the gang tackle on the ball carrier or jamming up on a potential receiver.

The Welsh attack took advantage of this to great effect, with a number of pops off to a runner on their shoulder right before contact catching out the defenders. Both hardy’s and Davies’ tries came from this, putting the runner through a hole to get through the defensive line, then playing it off to a support man.

Similarly, Tipuric’s try at the end came from Federico Mori jamming up on his own, which Sheedy had read. The delay on his pass took Mori completely out of the game and released Faletau, who again had support with him in the form of Tipuric to fully exploit the line break.

While their improved physicality is certainly helping them win more turnovers, the Azzurri need to work as a unit if they want to solidify their defence and keep the opposition’s score to a manageable level.

Autumn Nations Cup 2020: Ireland v Scotland

With 7ᵗʰ place sorted, it was on to Dublin, where Ireland faced off against Scotland for 3ʳᵈ place in the overall standings. The Irish were playing what Andy Farrell would probably consider his best available team and had the first chance to put points on the board with a penalty, only for Jonathan Sexton to put his kick wide. Scotland grew into the game and after Jaco van der Walt missed a kick on his Test debut, he successfully kicked his next 3 while Sexton also found success with a second effort. As the game began to open up around the half hour mark, an Irish attack was stopped by what referee Matthew Carley considered a deliberate knock on by Duncan Taylor and the centre was sent to the sin bin. The Irish took advantage of the extra man, kicking the initial penalty, and scoring the opening try just before the break, as Robbie Henshaw beat Darcy Graham in the air to a Sexton high ball into the Scotland in-goal, and Keith Earls beat Ali Price to the loose ball on the floor, though Sexton missed the conversion for an 11-9 lead at the halfway point.

The momentum remaining with Ireland after the break and they took advantage of it, with Cian Healy pushing over from a pick-and-go following a series of phases deep in the Scottish 22, before another set of phases in the 22 created a one-man overlap that allowed Peter O’Mahony to send Earls over in the corner, with Sexton adding both conversions. Scotland hit back with a wonderful solo effort from Duhan van der Merwe, sniping down the side of a ruck and past an oblivious Rob Herring before rounding Jacob Stockdale with an arcing run, van der Walt converting. However, the Scottish discipline let them down and Ross Byrne kicked a penalty. The Irish thought they had another try as O’Mahony was fed the ball in acres of space on the right wing, only for a covering tackle from van der Merwe to force him to put a toe in touch, but Byrne kicked another penalty to take the score to 31-16, and the Scots could find no answer in the final minutes.

Man of the match

Man of the Match Caelan Doris should be quickly becoming one of the first names on the team sheet. The Leinster back row brings an extra dimension to the Irish back row, making the hard metres alongside CJ Stander but also being able to open his legs and eat up the ground when given space.

Ireland need to find more ball carriers who can consistently make metres in attack in order to compete against the more physical teams like England, France and South Africa, and a back rower like Doris who can truck the ball up in the tight but also take the ball wider out helps to create a match-up nightmare.

Combining Doris with Stander also creates a degree of tactical flexibility, as both could conceivably pack down at 8 or 6 and do the same job around the pitch, allowing the team to vary who is at the base of the scrum to keep the defence guessing. With Stander an adept jackal, bringing in a flanker who will tackle non-stop would create a great balance to the back row and allow the star players to do what they do best.

Finding the balance

For so long, I have talked about how Scotland will be a threat if they can find the right balance, and it looks like they now have it in the back line. Ali Price is rowing into a very mature halfback and is probably underrated in his ability. In Stuart Hogg at 15 and whoever they have at 10 (van der Walt adding to the depth at the position with Duncan Weir, Adam Hastings and Finn Russell), they have a great playmaker axis, with Hogg creating space when he gets the ball out wide or coming in at first receiver to allow his fly half to play wider.

Duhan van der Merwe and Darcy Graham are arguably the most dangerous pairing on the wings, with Sean Maitland and Blair Kinghorn providing great alternatives, and with the current centre pairing, it looks like they are finally getting released.

Today’s pairing of Duncan Taylor and Chris Harris may be known more for their defensive organisation, which is an important factor in Test rugby, but they also help to create the platform in midfield by running at the line and also knowing when to pass. Harris especially has developed a better attacking game since his move to Gloucester and can be a danger in the 13 channel, while Taylor has the work rate that all coaches cherish. Combine this with the danger of the carriers in the pack and the dual playmakers, and the space will come for the stars out wide to shine.

It was notable that Scotland struggled to create without Taylor on the pitch, and also looked much more beatable in defence. Scotland need to get the Taylor/Harris centre pairing on the pitch as much as they can, or find someone who can come in and keep the dynamic going.

Autumn Nations Cup 2020: Georgia v Fiji

The Finals of the inaugural Autumn Nations Cup kicked off at Murrayfield, where Georgia were facing off against Fiji for 7ᵗʰ place in the overall standings. The Fijians were competing in their first match of the tournament following COVID-19 issues, but soon made up for lost time with 2 tries in the opening 10 minutes. First, Nemani Nadolo picked up a bouncing ball and powered through 2 tackles to score in the corner on his return from retirement, then just a few minutes later, young flanker Johnny Dyer pushed himself over from a pick-and-go following a neat move off a lineout, Ben Volavola kicking the second try. The Georgians finally got on the board with a penalty from Tedo Abzhandadze, but Fiji hit back again, with a late switch of sides from centre Levani Botia giving Volavola an overlap on the right, which they exploited to put Josua Tuisova over in the corner, with Volavola converting. The Georgians were growing into the game though, and won a series of penalties off the restart, which eventually ended in replacement prop Giorgi Melikidze getting over the line with a pick-and-go, which Abzhandadze converted for a 10-19 halftime score.

Conditions began to improve after the break, and Fiji continued to control the game for the most part, though Peni Ravai was adjudged to have knocked on as he tried to dot the ball down on the line. Any questions that a lack of match fitness would see Fiji tire in the second half were soon answered as they only seemed to get stronger as the weather brightened, and the game was effectively over as a contest as they scored 3 tries (2 of which Volavola converted) in an 8 minute spell around the hour mark. First, Tuisova fended off Sandro Todua and rode 3 tackles before offloading to flanker Mesulame Kunavula to score in the corner, then Volavola fed a grubber to the left corner and the experienced Nadolo reacted quickest, diving down on the ball and sliding the final metres over the line, before finishing his hat trick just minutes later with a crash ball off a lineout to draw level with Vereniki Goneva at the top of the team’s scoring charts and cap off a Man of the Match performance. The Georgians didn’t give up though, and they were able to get some consolation, with flanker Beka Saghinadze crashing through the Fijian defence with 12 minutes left and riding Botia’s tackle to dot down next to the posts, and he popped up again in the final minute with a strong drive off a pick-and-go to get a second try on the day, with Abzhandadze converting both of his tries for a final score of 24-38.

Naive Lelos

With legend Mamuka Gorgodze retired and new star Beka Gorgadze missing through injury, Tornike Jalaghonia was given the start at number 8. While the 21-year-old was certainly doing well with the ball in hand and making some good metres- so much so that he surely nailed on a starting spot somewhere in the pack for their next match – I can’t help feel that his inexperience and naivety proved costly at times.

The Georgian scrum appeared to have the dominance over Fiji, but on a number of occasions, Jalaghonia would break off the back of the scrum and go for a run. While that attacking play would often be praised for improving the spectacle, it was depriving the Lelos of the territory they would have gained had they kept the ball in the scrum and kicked the resultant penalty to touch.

Conditions in Edinburgh were poor for running rugby, and the Fijians were earning some dominance at the breakdown, but some smarter play at the scrum could have seen the Fijians lose a man to the bin for persistent offending as well as giving the Lelos better areas from which to attack or put the pressure on.

What we were missing

One of the big stories of this tournament has been the shambles of Fiji’s chance to play, with a spate of COVID-19 amongst the squad leading to all 3 of their pool matches being cancelled and each match considered a 28-0 win (bonus point win) for the other team, leaving them to fight for 7ᵗʰ.

Thankfully, the trip to Britain wasn’t wholly wasted for the Fijians – who included Mesulame Kunavula, who was unable to attend his own mother’s funeral – as they put on a great show to remind everyone of their quality. With former referee Glen Jackson on Vern Cotter’s staff, the discipline is clearly improving, but not at the expense of their incredible attacking play.

In Lomani and Volavola, they have a 9 and 10 who can control the game, while the back row and the majority of the backline are incredible man-mountains who are strong enough to run right over you, but also fleet enough of foot to sashay around you and slight of hand to offload if you do somehow manage to tackle them. Fiji are a team everyone wants to see more of, and the best way to do that is exactly what Georgia needs too: regular matches against Tier 1 nations, with a fair split between home and away matches. If Fiji can get this, the sky is the limit.

Eyes on the Ball

Thoughts from the world of sport and the Schmoedown

Month: December 2020